


Jolly Season

by BluePower24



Series: Troubled Mind [4]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Asperger Syndrome, Autism, Autism Spectrum, Autistic Lexa, Christmas, Gen, Holidays, I don't see the point of staying at the dinner table when I'm not eating, New Year's Eve, sue me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-02
Updated: 2019-02-02
Packaged: 2019-10-21 06:16:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 928
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17637365
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BluePower24/pseuds/BluePower24
Summary: Holidays are stressful, and Clarke wasn't invited.





	Jolly Season

It wasn’t’ like Lexa didn’t like her family. She did, but they could be a little… overwhelming sometimes. Lucky for her, she had her own room at grandma’s house, where she could avoid her family members all day long until dinner time.

At dinner, however…

_“So how is school going?”_

_“Do you like your course?”_

_“Do you have a boyfriend yet?”_

Lexa hated to be in the spot light, and she _hated_ these questions. The answers were always the same, and she hated to repeat herself. Not to mention that: 1) No, she actually hating her course, but she couldn’t tell anyone because they were all so happy and proud of her; and 2) Whenever someone asked her about _boyfriends_ , Lexa wished she could jump onto the table and scream _“I’m gay!”_

Being an autistic, closeted lesbian wasn’t easy.

Plus, these were the only topics of interest to her family. As soon as they were got bored of snooping in her personal life, they went back to the same old, boring topics that nobody should discuss at the dinner table: Politics, religion, and sports.

It was beyond boring, but she couldn’t leave yet. There was this unspoken rule that people had to stay seated even after they finished eating. Her mother said she should socialize with her family, but she had no interest in the conversation. Now, her grandpa was telling a story about hunting lions in Africa – or something like that – for the hundredth time! Why did Lexa had to stay and listen when she could almost tell that story herself?

Lexa started to feel anxious. She had no reason to stay there, but her mother wouldn’t let her leave.

_“Stay five more minutes.”_

_“You’re behaving so well.”_

_“You can go in a while.”_

She fidgets with her bracelet under the table. She had a good technic of day dreaming to keep herself entertained, but it was impossible to focus with all that noise. All the conversations, side conversations, the booming voice of her uncles, laughs… Loud, too loud.

Her first instinct was to text Clarke, but then remembered she had left her phone in her room.

_Clarke._

She wanted her to be there. Clarke would talk to her and it wouldn’t be boring, or loud. But Christmas was a family affair, and she was too scared of what her mother would say if she even brought that up. Besides, Clarke would have plans with her family, for sure.

So, Lexa sat there, quietly, until she couldn’t take it anymore. She stood up, excused herself to go to the bathroom, and hid in her room.

But Christmas was nothing compared to...

New Year’s Eve.

 

 

New Year’s Eve would bare a close resembles to Christmas, tradition wise. But instead of going her grandma’s house, all her family came to her house.

But it was fine. Lexa had things completely under control. She had prepared for every possible scenario, from unexpected guests to those trips to restaurants her parents always fail to inform her about. So yeah, she could handle this…

…Except that…

“Lexa, your mattress is best one in the house, and grandma has been having back pain, so she’ll be sleeping in your room tonight, ok?”

It all happens in the space of that sentence. Her mother had barged into her room, dropped off a few bags and suddenly she was gone. Lexa was left sitting at her desk, looking at those red bags and trying to process what had just happened.

Her grandparents must have arrived. Her grandma was staying the night, as usual, but… Was she going to sleep in her room? What? No! Why? She should go downstairs and great the guests but… Was she being kicked out of her own room?

Her hands began to get sweaty.  It was _her_ room, with _her_ bed, and _her_ things! Her room was her sanctuary, why was her mother just… offering it without talking to her first? And where would she sleep? She couldn’t fall asleep anywhere else. And what if she needed something from her room, and her grandma was still sleeping? Lexa glared at the bags. They didn’t belong there.

But then again…

If grandma didn’t feel well… And her matter was, in fact, the best in the house…

She knew she should be ok with this. She wasn’t a heartless monster. But a selfish part of her still didn’t approve of this.

Ugh! Why couldn’t Clarke be there. Clarke always knew how to put some order to her thoughts. This time, Lexa had asked her mother if she could invite Clarke over, but her mother said _no_.

“New Year’s Eve is a family affair.” Again with that crap? “She probably has plans already.” _Oh._

Lexa had time to calm down during the day. She had all day to hide in her room and think it over before deciding what to do. Even though she wanted to just forget about the problem until it disappeared, she knew it was inevitable.

After the countdown, she received a call from Clarke wishing a happy new year. It turned out that Clarke was spending the turning with her friends, at a rented apartment near the coast so they could see the fireworks. _Hm, turns out it isn’t a family affair after all._

When it was time to go to bed, Lexa swallowed her pride, packed a back with her laptop, phone and charged and went to sleep in one of the spare rooms.

She didn’t sleep at all that night, but at least her consciousness was quiet.

 

**Author's Note:**

> If you came this far, thank you for reading and I apologize for the terrible quality.  
> I know this one is very rushed, but exam season and other personal problems have been destroying all my creative energy. Still, I wanted to write something (even though I’m very late for the party).  
> I honestly don’t know what to say about this one. I think it’s self-explanatory, but if you have any questions, want me to talk about some topic, or just give constructive criticism, feel free to leave a comment. Please and thank you.


End file.
